Wednesday, March 18, 2015

What is family?

I was at a wedding this past weekend.

It was my nephew Nick Waldrom and his new bride Darlene. They are a loving and precious couple and the celebration was exceptional. Everyone's joy at the joining of this couple was obvious. As is typical now days there were parents and step-parents. Lots of siblings, cousins both full blood, half and step relations. There were lots of those by marriage and intimate long time friends.

As I watched the interaction of all those present, brought together by love for the couple I took the time to observe the attachments. My nephew's long time best friend Shelby was his best man. I have known this young man and remember his connection to my family. There was no difference in the way he was treated and accepted as family. It was the same familial love and attachment that the families showed to all of the others.

Cousins by marriage are the same as cousins born into the family. Aunts and uncles by blood or marriage are drawn in, given the same love and respect. My new niece's daughter Lila is as much a part of the family as their little son together Alex. She is my niece. No questions.

Everyone made a supreme effort to celebrate the wedding, to honor the marriage and have a great time together. This is probably the one time most of us from both sides of the aisle will be all together and made it important to be united. We did it by laughing, dancing, toasting and enjoying the event.

I am proud of my family-all of them. They are mine and I am theirs.

One side note, my husband really likes fireball shots!

-N

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Role reversal

For many years I have been unhappy with the way I looked. Specifically my weight. My husband has always been supportive and loves me no matter what. I was good at making excuses and there were so many times he would encourage me to be more active, but I was a typical overweight person who would jump into exercising for a few days and then would let stress, life etc. give me the excuse to stop.

I would talk about how much I walked at work (a big facility) or I would say I was cutting back on calories (except at work) and justify my laziness. I remember my sister telling me to just make goals and go for it.

She was living in California and not working at the time and was losing and toning daily. I was jealous of her free time and envious of her daily routine. She was dropping the pounds and looking great. I was not. By the time she moved back to Phoenix she was so skinny, tan and beautiful. I was truly happy for her and she really did look wonderful. I didn't look so great.

I knew my co-workers made the time for fitness and I also knew they were just as busy as me, so what was my problem.  Solution-I was lazy.

Skip to now.

My husband's work in North Dakota has made it possible for me to "retire" and after months of not working and being a couch potato I was packing on more weight. I would do energetic things here and there like riding my bike or taking walks but not with any consistency. My brain just wasn't interested. After living in North Dakota for about seven months in a nice and fairly large RV I returned to our Tucson home. The RV is in storage and I was back home. Still not working except for blogging and working on a couple of writing projects, I began to become rather reclusive. I cleaned my house, easy without messy hubby there and didn't go anywhere. It was nice but not necessarily healthy physically or mentally.

I needed motivation.

About two months ago my niece asked if I wanted to come as her guest to the gym she goes to with her family. I thought why not? I'm not a gym rat and never have been but I like doing the weight training. The gym was not huge (no pool or spa) but was really comfortable and welcoming. I saw several other women who looked just like me-ok I can do this. I really had a good time especially being with my niece and nephew. They were encouraging and before I knew it I had been there an hour and had broke a small sweat.

I went back with her a couple more times. I talked to my husband about joining and bringing him as my guest as she had done with me and he agreed!  This began a transformation for me. Initially I was going into the gym every other day for an hour. I had an "aha" moment when the lure of the local state park walking trails attracted me and began my alternating the gym and the park. Yes-I was going everyday!

I have only missed three days in the 4-5 weeks.

My husband works two weeks on and two weeks off, so he flies down here for the two weeks off. We have really enjoyed doing my exercise routine together.  We each have our gym thing we like and are exploring more outdoor trails and pushing the limits. It has become routine for me and I am realizing the effects of my efforts in pound and inches.

I have quite a way to go but my brain has quit fighting and started to embrace this new lifestyle.
Now I am encouraging my sister, who is working way too many hours at her job she loves, is becoming a bit stressed out and has gained a few pounds back.

Role reversal.

-N